Queen Elizabeth II celebrated her Platinum Jubilee this weekend, marking 70 years of service to the British monarch. When she finally passes the torch to Prince Charles, whenever that day comes, he will become the oldest living British monarch to ever take the throne. Charles, 73, has spent his entire life in preparation to wear the crown.
I’ve never had much of a fondness for the monarch. I don’t search social media high and low looking for the latest royal gossip and I certainly have no kingdom or ties to royalty waiting for me. However, if Prince Charles ever decides to come to me for advice, I’m ready. I bring back my occasional, rambling list of what I would do if I were King of the World.
Here goes nothing:
–We would just all admit that whether you love or hate Country Music singer and philanthropist Dolly Parton or love or hate her music for that matter, she is a modern day philosopher and blessing. We should all just admit that she has it right.
- “The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.”
- “I wish you joy and happiness. But above all of this, I wish you love.”
- “I think gay couples should be allowed to marry. They should suffer just like us heterosexuals.”
- “You’ll never do a whole lot unless you’re brave enough to try.”
–We’d have our choice of a four-day work week. On the weekend, brunch would be the norm. You’d sleep until 8, get a shower, and then meet your friends for brunch at 9:30 or 10. Let’s make brunch a thing again.
–Dogs would rule and well, you know the rest, cats would drool and be kicked outside to fend for themselves.
–Everyone would get a day off on their birthday, no work, no school, no obligations. Turning 10, 20, or even 60 and 70 is hard enough on its own, no need to add other obligations to your big day. Go out and enjoy your birthday. Happy Birthday!
–I’d make naps a normal part of each day. I traveled to Spain a few years ago. I have to say I came back with a new appreciation for a bit of bread and smidge of olive oil, yes, very tasty, a cool glass of sangria overlooking a picturesque vista, and the immense, immense value of a siesta.
–I would mandate that everyone who graduates high school and has turned 18 would be required to serve at least two years in one of the U.S. Armed Forces or Peace Corps, which helps those in need outside of the United States, or the AmeriCorps, which provides volunteer opportunities to those who would like to promote civil engagement and improve the lives of people in the United States. Yes, two years is a big commitment but the move would put a renewed focus on service and helping your neighbor. And plus, I’d send anyone who didn’t want to serve to my dungeon! Now that would be a strong deterrent.
Oh, I’ll never be a king, but then again, Prince Charles will never get to live a normal life like me!
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