An Angel When I Needed It Most

(A version of this story appeared on The Heart of The Matter in November 2023.)

The thing I noticed first was his calmness. He wasn’t like the other teachers, coaches, or family friends in my life. He had a soft voice that you sometimes had to strain to hear and he rarely seemed to yell or scold. 

Within five minutes of his class starting on the first day, he gave my classmates and me each a folder and magic marker and told us to write our names — last name first, first name last — in the lefthand corner of the folder. Of course, I messed up right away, writing out my name the standard fashion. I wanted to cry. When he saw what I had done, he took my folder and said that it wasn’t a problem. In fact, he told me not to worry about it, he had changed his mind and wanted to do something else.

I remember being shocked that I wasn’t in trouble. I didn’t know how to respond. 

The other thing that stood out about him was his positive attitude and excitement about learning. No problem was too big and he wanted to make the school day fun. If we were going to learn about the Mayan Civilization or the rise of Mesopotamia then by God we were going to get up out of our seats and have fun with it and see it and feel it for ourselves. He wasn’t big on just following a book. We would create our own early civilization and figure things out like the Mayans. 

If we were talking about Math, then he would get into teams and make it a game, not only up on the board, where we had to show our work, but using incentives to get the correct answer and the chance to throw a nerf ball into a large waste basket that stood up in the middle of the room. We rarely stood seated in our chairs for long. He wanted to make learning fun. 

Having a heart

Mr. Guss and his crazy antics came at the exact right time for me. A few weeks before I went off to sixth grade, I watched as my father had a major heart attack in front of my brothers and myself. (See my post All in a day’s work.) He started convulsing and frothing at the mouth one summer day when he took a nap on our couch and would have died if my two older brothers had not acted quickly and called for an ambulance. No dialing 911 back then. 

When my father was released from the hospital, he was still picking up the pieces and I was nowhere ready to start school. I was an 11 year-old mess. Something had changed in me. I felt small and anxious. I was bothered easily and probably a little shell-shocked and depressed. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, something worse to happen. I wanted to do well and didn’t care about anything all at the same time. Of course, I didn’t have a lot of resources at my disposal to help me through my problems. My mother was struggling to keep us together and my my brothers had their own worries and concerns. 

Making a difference

Looking back now I see where I was ready to give up, but something happened. Mr. Guss, seemed to be the one person who got it and got me. I have no idea if he knew about my home situation, I want to say yes, but I have no idea how he would’ve found out. I know I wasn’t telling anyone, but he sure acted like he did. He made me laugh and kept me at ease. He praised my work and encouraged me to do better. He helped me to develop a love of learning and to trust again. He made me want to do great things. 

Yes, my life at home was still tumultuous, but he was the right person in my life at the right time. 

When I think about the people, places, and things that I most appreciate in my life, many different images flash across my mind. My wife and kids are tops on that list. I think how they make me happy and fulfilled. 

I think too of my parents and friends and family members. Forty-seven years later, though, I find that I often think about a tall, skinny teacher who helped me through a difficult experience.

A lasting impression

People come and go in our lives for millions of different reasons and have a huge impact on us. Sometimes we recognize that imprint right away. We know they’ve helped us for the better. Other times, it takes years for us to recognize it for ourselves and it’s only when we step away that we get to see the difference they made. 

Mr. Guss helped me through one of the most challenging times in my life. As I’ve gotten older, I find that I think often about people like him and try to be deliberate in reaching out and thanking those who’ve made a difference. 

We all have a Mr. Guss in our life. 

When I’ve been able to get in contact with the positive influences on my life, it’s been a heartwarming experience, if nothing more than to remind myself and others around me, that angels and good people still exist. 

Thank you Mr. Guss!

Who has been a big influence in your life? How were they able to help you? 

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