The underbelly of history!

Get a load of these facts:

–Exhibit A: Alexander Graham Bell secured the first U.S. patent for the telephone 150 years ago on March 7, 1876. He narrowly beat one of his biggest rivals. Three days later, Bell famously made the first successful telephone call to his assistant, Thomas Watson. Hello smartphone!

–Exhibit B: Theodore Roosevelt drank roughly a gallon of coffee each day. Visitors to the White House commented often on the strength and amount of the coffee served during his presidency. From the sounds of it, Roosevelt would’ve given the local Starbucks or Dunkin a run for it’s money.

–Exhibit C: Hatshepsut, one of Egypt’s most prolific builders and pharaohs, brought great wealth and artistry to her land. She sponsored successful trading expeditions, bringing back gold, ebony hardwood, and incense from Punt (modern-day Eritrea in Africa). Her reign brought prosperity, yet she was almost erased from history by later rulers. Oh the pettiness!

I love history.

Oh, I love the systematic study of the past. I get passionate diving into the details on how countries and borders were established, constitutions created, and how human experiences and interactions came to be. But, let’s get real. I love the overlooked portions of history too. I love the saucy scandal and the intrigue. I love a good juicy historical piece of gossip.

Spilling the Tea!

Yes, let’s get real. Humans are crazy. Naturally then our history is crazy too. It’s why places like the 21 museums that make up the Smithsonian Institute should not be managed by politicians — Republican or Democrat for that matter. Historians should manage them, but that’s a story for another day.

In any event, I find it fascinating to learn how wars got started? Who got rich and who skipped town without paying their bill? Who was friends with whom? Who slept with whom? Who drank too much? Who didn’t drink at all? And who couldn’t stand each other? And even things that just don’t make sense — like who couldn’t follow a simple calendar.

For example, the U.S. will celebrate an important milestone on July 4th — 250 years of American Independence. There will be fireworks, parades, and patriotic events, commemorating the nation’s founding and democratic ideals. The celebrations, though, will be on the wrong day and it will have nothing to do with too much alcohol. Or over-eagerness. Or our love of blasting colorful fireworks high into the sky at all hours of the night.

The Second Continental Congress voted for independence on July 2, 1776. It was a grave decision for the 13 colonies. They were signing up for certain death. They were voting to separate from Great Britain. They would found their own country. It naturally holds that we should be celebrating on the 2nd, right?

You would think, but that’s not the case. The 4th is traditionally celebrated as Independence Day because it’s the day that the continental congress formally adopted the Declaration of Independence. Go figure?

It’s a small detail, but an amusing one to me. It’s like celebrating St. Patrick’s Day on March 19. Let’s get our days straight people!

I heard it through the grapevine!

It’s not just the Declaration of Independence. It’s other things too. It’s things like learning that English and Danish writers Charles Dickens and Hans Christian Andersen started out as friends. Andersen was naturally pleased to make Dickens acquaintance. For a while, they were best buds.

However, they grew to despise each other when Andersen visited Dickens’ country home in Higham, Kent, but never left. He stayed for five weeks. How would you feel if your new best friend comes to visit and never leaves? Dickens eventually was forced to tell Andersen that he needed go home. Friend or not, Dickens’ had enough. When calm was finally restored, Dickens stopped writing Andersen and ended their friendship.

No friendship bracelets here. No beers together in the local pub after a stressful week. Forget about a yearly Christmas Card too. Dude, get a life, and go home.

The talk of the town

Here’s something else. I’m fascinated by great romances and not-so-great romances in history and how the nitty gritty of home-life can influence world affairs. Historians widely believe that Catherine the Great, the long-reigning Empress of Russia, was complicit in the death of her husband, Emperor Peter III, in 1762. He died shortly after being deposed in a coup led by Catherine, with his death officially cited as a stroke, but likely murdered by her supporters.

Now that’s getting on your wife’s last nerve! What did he do? Forget to put down the toilet seat? Forget to buy her roses on Valentine’s Day or their Anniversary? Dude, you can’t forget that.

As a husband, I can kind of relate. I’ve had my moments over the years of falling down on the job. I suspect we all can. Life can get crazy. But fortunately I’ve never been taken out to the woodshed and getting traded in for a newer version! Ooooh, not cool at all.

A little birdie told me

Yes, the real minutia of history isn’t always pretty. It can be downright ugly, but that’s what I think most people find interesting. We learn from those truths. We learn and we move on. If we’re wise, we do better.

Who knows what future generations will be saying about current times? Something tells me that there will be lots of sorrowful deeds. You just need to look at the daily headlines to see the juicy gossip we’re giving them to review. And more than a few enablers will have egg on their faces. Maybe handcuffs too. Only time will tell.

But that’s a story for another day.

It leads me to ask: What about you? Are you a history trivia geek like me or is it too much for you?

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Here’s some more stuff that I find fascinating.

–Off with their heads. France introduced the guillotine in 1792 during the French Revolution. It was still in use not that long ago. The last official execution took place on September 10, 1977, at Baumettes Prison in Marseille. While public executions ended in 1939, the device remained France’s official method of capital punishment until abolished in 1981. 

–No super-tall skyscrapers in Singapore. Due to flight paths, buildings in Singapore’s central business district are generally not permitted to be higher than 280 meters (918 feet). By comparison, Dubai’s skyscrapers average about 323.9 meters. Oh definitely visit, just remember to keep your head down.

–The lasting effects of D-Day and Operation Overlord. Geologists have reported that as much as 4% of the sand on Normandy’s Omaha Beach is broken-down shrapnel from the June 6, 1944 landing, the largest amphibious invasion in history. Over 156,000 American, British, and Canadian troops landed on five beaches —Utah, Omaha, Gold, Juno, and Sword — supported by thousands of ships and aircraft, establishing a foothold despite over 10,000 casualties.

–Apple pie too. Canadians invented basketball (James Naismith, 1891), the telephone (Alexander Graham Bell, 1876), insulin to treat diabetes (team of Toronto researchers, 1922), the heart pacemaker (John Hopps, 1950), peanut butter (Marcellus Gilmore Edson, 1884), and the Wonderbra (Louise Poirier, 1964). It doesn’t get more American than that. Don’t tell President Trump! Next you’re going to tell me Canada invented Apple Pie, Baseball, red Solo Cups, and super-sized food and drink portions.

–And if you’re nice to me, I’ll throw in some oceanfront property in Arizona for free. In 1820, Scottish Adventurer Gregor MacGregor invented the fictitious country of Poyais supposedly near Honduras in Central America. He created authentic looking guidebooks, a flag, constitution, and maps. He issued bank notes and sold land for 4 shillings an acre. He lured more than 250 settlers to his non-existent paradise. When investors arrived, they found no settlement, government, or infrastructure, resulting more than 100 deaths from disease and starvation. MacGregor fled to France to continue his scam there, before ultimately fleeing again to Venezuela. Sounds like a Jeopardy category. Yes, Alex, let’s try “Take The Money and Run” for $600.