Smarter than a fifth grader

When my kids were in elementary school, they would spit out information faster than I could keep up. I remember one time my middle son explaining to me how the tectonic shift in the plates that make up the Earth’s crust created the continents and map that we know today.

I tried to respond, but I remember thinking: “I have nothing to add, he knows more than me.”

Another time, my youngest son at dinner explained to me how Physics work. Now there’s no hope of me trying to explain it to you today, but for thirty minutes at the dinner table, one night in 2018, I felt like I was one of two or three people in the world, who understood the study of matter. I felt so smart, like I could hang with some of the smartest people on the planet. I walked away from the table with a little strut and yelled for Bill Gates to “eat my dust,” Jeff Bezos “to talk to the hand, because the face wasn’t listening,” and the rocket scientists at NASA to leave a message on my answering machine because I was too busy to pick-up their call. Yea, don’t ask, I was losing it.

Photo by Max Fischer on Pexels.com

Anyway, I write today on the Heart of the Matter in my post, Role reversal: Learning from my kids, on how the tectonic plates in my life as a father have shifted and I now learn more from my adult kids than what they learn from me. Oh, yes, some of that makes all the sense in the world. They’re really smart adults, but it’s still a little disconcerting.

Here’s what I mean. I’m well educated. I have a master’s degree. I’ve experienced much in my life. But, I find that I’m asking myself a lot: “How did they get so smart?”

Check out my story on the Heart of the Matter and let me know what you think.

Role reversal: Learning from my kids

on The Heart of The Matter.


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34 thoughts on “Smarter than a fifth grader

  1. I love that I learn from my kids (and they still learn from me) – they are 24 and 25, soon to be 26 years old. I also believe it’s important to have friends of all ages because we can learn so much from each one. When I worked in a golf club as a waitress, I befriended some I called my kids and some that could have been my parents 🙂

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    1. When my kids were younger, they hated that I remembered their friends names and asked about them. When I was friendly with them, that even worse. Funny how that’s changed over time. (Maybe it’s a guy thing, but I have joked with my wife that it’s easier for her. With social media and such, I’ve never wanted to offend any of my kid’s friends by being creepy or being a stalker. Yea, silly of me, but there have been stranger things in the news.) And you’re right, it’s good to have friends of all ages. Much better that way!!!

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      1. Haha! Of course. One of my son’s friends hung out with me and we had supper while my son was sleeping, not feeling well – read hung over 😉 I’ve been lucky, more than once both of my kids’ friends have asked me to come say hello (as my kids roll their eyes).
        Now, like you, they are okay with it. I stay away from them all on FB, though!!

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  2. I love, love, love a silly Brian rant and this one had me rolling:

    I walked away from the table with a little strut and yelled for Bill Gates to “eat my dust,” Jeff Bezos “to talk to the hand, because the face wasn’t listening,” and the rocket scientists at NASA to leave a message on my answering machine because I was too busy to pick-up their call. Yea, don’t ask, I was losing it.

    Hilarious – and I say revel in your new-found intelligence, all day, every day! 🤣😎🤣

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  3. I totally relate. My kids are smart adults and they came up with things as kids that stumped me. My son asked a question to his fourth grade teacher that the teacher couldn’t answer. My son got sent out into the hall and the teacher yelled at him, “You don’t know everything, Robert!” My son calmly answered, “I know that.”

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    1. Yes, good for him. If the teacher was going to send him out in the hall for asking something he/she didn’t know themselves. Ha, ha. But, yes, it does pose a different kind of parenting challenge. “You’re smart now little Janie or little Johnny, but you still need to be nice to the little people.” Ha, ha.

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      1. Yes, what a horrible teacher. Yes, kids can be smart with the responses and need to be respectful, but in a situation like that where he’s obviously gifted . . . you don’t kill that spark. Ugh. I hate stories like that, bugs me to death, because it can have such a long-ranging impact.

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      2. Kids do need to be respectful, but sometimes out of the mouth of babes…they can say things that don’t sound respectful without meaning to. Fortunately, there were a few amazing teachers at the school who kept his spark alive.

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  4. Obviously Brian, I think you have a little something to do with these tidbits of trivia that went swirling over my head like a bat out of you know where! 🤔🦇😂 Yeah, kids can teach us a thing or two, but often it’s three, four, five, six, seven,…but who’s counting? The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree as they say!!! 😜🍎😲

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    1. The apple might not fall far … but my kids aren’t even giving me credit for helping them. Get a load of this: They had the audacity to lecture me over T-giving about eating right, exercising, and being healthy. Okay, okay, I might have deserved the lecture (too much coffee and soda and junk food) but I had to remind them about where they learned all that good information. Um, yes it was me. Damn kids!!! Ha ha ha! 😎😎🤣🤣🤣🥃😎

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      1. I am laughing my ass off here Brian! 😂😜🤣 I am sorry, but your stuff is excellent comedy material. Their comments remind me of Euell Gibbons who did the Grape Nuts commercial back in the day. He would say, “See this cattail, it’s edible and great in essential vitamins and nutrients.” 🥣 Do they still make that cereal by the way? If they do, I need to go get me some of that! Good luck with the exercising and healthy eating. Those little smart-asses! 😝

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      2. My point exactly. It’s Thanksgiving Weekend and the lil shits (sorry for the swearing, but they deserve it) were lecturing me on eating healthy, when I let them slide for eating chicken nuggets or Mac and cheese or even ice cream for dinner. Pullllleeeeassse. And by the way, they’re not so little. My youngest son skies over me now. As far as grape nuts, I have no idea, but I think it does. I thought I saw it at my mom’s when I went to visit. I swear it was a box of grape nuts. And yes, I need lots of help with the exercising and healthy eating. I’m starting by giving up soda/caffeine. Ugh. Crazy me. Ha, ha.

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      3. Well Brian my friend, I applaud your determination, but don’t be so hard on yourself. Look, start with just a little bit a day, or a week even. I veered off my exercising routine somewhat…ok, a lot. 😝 I have tried to be consistent, but sometimes I am, and sometimes I am not. Yet, I don’t overwhelm myself or beat myself up by following a strict routine because someone says so, including my doctor! 😲 I refuse to, at this age, to be miserable for the sake of oversaturated do’s and don’ts of how to live healthy by someone else’s standards. If my mind ain’t in it, honey chile….it ain’t gonna happen! No you go out there and have yourself a badass day!!! 🤣🌞😂

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  5. I’ve asked myself that same question Brian- how did they get so smart? Sometimes I even like to think I had a small part in the process, encouraging them to seek out learning opportunities and answers. In reality though, I’m sure it’s all just them and that’s as it should be 😉

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  6. During daycare pickup earlier this week, one of the kids in my son’s group came up to me and started yapping off trivia and all I wanted to do was pick up my child and go home. 😆

    Kids really are a wonder and they teach us so much. I agree about this tectonic shift. I see it with my mom now as she’s a senior and I can’t wait to get to the age when I’m bugging my son for tech help. It’s both amusing and humbling to go through this shift!

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  7. I don’t have adult kids… My boy is 10, yet I realise he knows a lot of stuff and teaches me some…and just like you I am educated and smart/intelligent… How do they get so smart

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  8. I’ve always been the “cool” mom who got along with everyone. From the siblings of my kids’ friends to the parents of my kid’s friends. From the coaches to the refs. From the students to the janitors.

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