100 MPH in Slow Motion

I could see the car crash coming. It was right there in front of me. The other cars seemed to be driving 100 mph and in slow motion all at the same time. I swerved right and then back hard to the left.

Let me set the scene properly. I was fully prepared, sitting at my desk ten minutes early, my papers and notes laid out before me. When the time came for my presentation, I wanted to be ready. I wanted to have my game face on and have everything I needed to jump into the action. Things started out smoothly enough until finally the cue was given.

I was up. It was showtime with a capital S.

Staring Down the Smirk

I could see right away that it was put-up-or-shut-up time. One of the main guys in the meeting had a certain presence, less of a friendly how are you doing and more of a “show me what you got” attitude. His smirky grin gave him away. I introduced myself and started my presentation. Oh how I hate presentations! Yes, yes, I know that most everyone hates them, but I really hate them. This is where my stutter still likes to come out—where it still likes to let me know who’s boss.

My stomach starts to stress, my heart feels like it’s going to burst out of my body, and I fumble words like they’re a hot potato. My stutter sabotages me. It makes me come across as less than confident in my knowledge and expertise. On this day, though, I took a look at the crash wreckage all around me and was determined to give it the middle finger.

F-you, nerves. F-you, stutter.

The smirking guy was eager to “help out” and play his role in the challenge. He tried to take me off course right from the get-go. I swerved to the right, dodging the collision, and then swung back to the left, forcing the presentation back on track. The psychological rainstorm and limited time tried to slow me down, but I continued unfettered. I was not going to be stopped today. I was determined to have my say.

Of course, then came another question. The guy’s accomplice wanted to throw in his two cents, too. The second guy wanted to play Bellatrix Lestrange to the smirking guy’s Voldemort routine. Not a fan of Harry Potter, then how about Dr. Evil and Mini Me from Austin Powers fame, Jafar and Lago, the talking parrot, in Aladdin, or even Scar and the Hyenas from The Lion King?

In my mind, both guys seemed to be out to trip me up. I was not to be stopped. I looked both of them straight in the eyes—even if it was through my laptop screen—and responded with the facts. I wasn’t going to be talked down to and I most certain wasn’t going to be deterred.

Making the Final Pitch

I looked at the clock and saw it was time for the call to action. I summed up my spiel and made my pitch. My story came together just as I had planned. I might not get the exact result I wanted, but I was gonna give it my best shot. And that’s what I did. I may not win every battle, but it wasn’t going to be for a lack of trying.

F-you, mystery man. He was going to rue the day he tried to derail me. I was going to walk across that corporate battlefield proud of myself.

And I did.

We’ve all been there—staring down the “smirker” in the room, feeling our hearts beat out of our chests, waiting for our false steps to trip us up. But sometimes, just standing your ground is the win.

Have you ever had to fight to keep a presentation or a project on the rails? How did you handle the “evil Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader” from Star Wars in your work and home life? Let me know in the comments below.


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27 thoughts on “100 MPH in Slow Motion

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  1. Oh presentations – and those of the pitching nature – are the worse. Both the internal factors, such as nerves, and external factors, such as the smirk people and conversation derailers, make things so hard. Good for you for pushing through those hurdles and getting through the presentation. That is often half the battle!

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    1. I’m competitive as the next guy … but the smirkers and people who put up silly obstacles for the pure joy are the worst. This isn’t war and peace. It’s a simple presentation. Ugh. Fortunately I don’t have too many of these but they come up every now and again. Thanks Ab!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I did avoid a crash. And I’m sure some of the potential accidents were in my own head . . . but I’ve seen too many people like the smirker not to keep my distance. I think it’s the naive side of my personality. I may not be best friends with someone. I may even disagree with them but I have no ill will towards them. I have to remind myself at times that not everyone has the same values. I try to wish them well and move on. Ugh.

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  2. Oh yeah…I’ve been there and you put it perfectly! Sometimes I’ve withered and sometimes I’ve stood my ground. Good for you for doing the latter because naysayers seem to just kill vision and ingenuity if you don’t!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s where I really am naive. I just don’t understand why someone would want to make another person feel stupid or silly for the heck of it. It’s a conversation. If you disagree with what I’m saying then fine, but let’s have a conversation versus punching holes to just punch holes in someone else’s balloon. Ugh. Doesn’t make sense to me.

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  3. I had a few difficult people to work with back in my PR and Marketing days. One director tried to put me on the spot wanting to know my “plan” on my first day. I was hoping to gather information before I presented a plan…In the end after a rough start, she came around. It must have been a power trip on her part.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Corporate bullies! The Frat Bros, Tech Bros, Finance Bros…There is always a group of smirking, single focus arrogant ass*****! But, I don’t have any opinions. It sounds like you cracked the code on dealing with these corporate bullies, know your facts and stick to solid ideas.

    It might be interesting to see in the aftermath how the quiet support of you from everyone else. People always feel better around the quieter, steadier guy than the “bros”.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve see the good and bad in corporate life. I just don’t understand folks who try to be ass****s. I don’t understand it. I get that you may have your opinion and I may have mine, but I don’t understand being difficult for difficulties sake. It doesn’t make sense to me. Ugh. And you’re right, I do think that quiet, leadership gets more things done. Thanks for the support.

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  5. My whole corporate career was a matter of presenting to those whose co-operation was necessary to achieve my goals. There usually was one of those derailers in each meeting. Many times I was presenting a program that would need resources which all the others in the meeting were afraid would come from their programs. It started small but finally worked up to board of director fights. I won most but did put my job on the line for the last one, which I lost. I still felt like a winner walking out.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh John, you just described my meeting. Yes, very much dealing with a fight over resources. I won this battle, but I tire easily now of silly territorial fights and lip service about mission and serving others. So yes, I see the end coming eventually. I’ve lost the patience that I once had. But like you I want to be able to look myself in the mirror and walk out with head held high. Thanks for reading.

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  6. I hate talk in public and presentation , especially if accompanied by the support of a screen and technology that never work when it supposed to but once you manage to start that is it.
    One thing I give to the Italian school system , from primary to university, is that contrary to the anglosassone one prepare you) or used to in my days to that) because we had oral exams once or twice a week in e every subject. Someone , or more than one, was randomly picked in the class and asked to go to teacher desk where they were interrogated😬and either shamed or praised in front of their peers. That prepares you or makes you kind of immune to public exposure I suppose😉

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    1. Yes, I didn’t even get into how I was set up 20 minutes early but had to do a quick reboot when MS Teams froze on me! Yikes. I’m not sure what I think of the oral exam – on one hand I can see how the practice would get you ready. On the other hand I could see it frustrating the heck out of primary school Brian. Oh my, my stutter would’ve been on full display. Ha ha, these are the moments when I’m glad I’m the age I am!!!! Ha ha 🤣 🤣🤣🤣🤣😎

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