I hurt myself today

I write today on the Heart of the Matter in my story, You don’t have to Try, about how I stumbled across Colbie Caillet’s song Try for the first time and how it moved me to put down my guard. I stopped worrying about fitting in and instead focused on just being myself.

In the same vein, I wrote last year about how the song Nothing compares 2 U helped me with a major life decision. I hear even a small sliver of the song and I’m back to being a twenty-something between a rock and a hard place.

“I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant
But nothing
I said nothing can take away these blues.”

Music has a way of touching us and moving us in ways we never might have expected. I can think of any number of songs that made me feel that way. It’s not just those two.

The first time I heard Johnny Cash sing Nine Inch Nails’ song Hurt on the radio, I had to do a double check. It was not something that I would expect hear on my local radio station. I couldn’t get the first few phrases out of my head:

“I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that’s real”

Cash’s gravelly voice reeked of emotion and feeling. I was literally stopped in my tracks. Cash recorded the song less than a year before his death in 2002 as part of his album, American IV: The Man Comes Around.

I heard the pain of his voice and felt like I needed to act. I called my parents right away. I didn’t really have much to say. I just needed to check in on them. Of course, they were fine and happy to hear from me. I felt almost foolish, but I was still glad I made the call. When my dad died several years later, I thought back to Cash’s song and was glad that I called my parents out of the blue when the idea hit me. I was glad that I didn’t hold back.

It’s other songs too.

I’m not a particularly big fan of Shania Twain, but when I hear her song “You’re Still the One,” I think of my wife and our story.

“Looks like we made it
Look how far we’ve come, my baby
We mighta took the long way
We knew we’d get there someday.”

I suspect it’s a song that most long married couples can relate to, but it still hits home for me.

What songs touch you?

Related Stories:

• You don’t have to try on The Heart of the Matter
• Like a Rhinestone Cowboy
• A different kind of sound
• Fighting back against should and must!
• Dragging my feet