Look for me there

When Luke Russet was eight years old, his father, American television journalist Tim Russert, took him to a Baltimore Orioles baseball game. As they made their way to their seats, they momentarily lost each other in the crowd. When the older Russert looked back and saw his son, he ran back to him and told him:

“Buddy, if we’re ever separated, just look for me there,” he said, pointing at a hot dog stand with a big, memorable Oriole bird logo. He pauses and looks me up and down. “But we won’t ever be separated.”

When the older Russert died of a sudden heart attack in 2008, the memory of that day would come back to his son. Luke Russert would go on to work at NBC for eight years, but when the thought of his dad got to be too much, he walked away from the job. He traveled the world looking for his father and reflects on that search in his 2023 memoir, Look For Me There: Grieving My Father, Finding Myself.

I’ll be here

As a father, I can relate to setting up a meeting spot. My kids are all in their twenties but I still have had my moments waking up in a cold sweat fearing I’ve lost one of them in a large crowd. When my kids were young and we went to a sports arena, movie theater, or some place where I was alone with them and I couldn’t follow them into the rest room or some other place, we’d set up a meeting spot.

Like Russert, we would choose random places, the open area right outside a restroom, a seating area with their favorite number, any place close by but within arms reach. Before I sent them into the restroom alone and I would tell them, “Look for me, l’ll be here.”

Look for me

My kids are past the age where they need to look for me to protect them. They’re grown adults now, but I’ve been thinking about places where they might find me in the future as we both age and move on with our lives. Here’s a few of the places I would tell them to look for me going forward:

• Find my Laptop. I’m a writer first and foremost. I’d tell them to find my laptop. Find my laptop and you’ll eventually find me. The same way I need air to breathe, I need to write to be myself. Find my laptop and you’ll find me.
• Find the nearest trail.
• Find the nearest bookstore. I’ll be the one in the dark corner, figuring out how many books I can buy and add to my ever-increasing pile.
• Find the mountains and the ocean. I need to be a few hours away from the mountains and the ocean. I need the calm that only God and nature can provide.
• Find the humor. Life is hard. There are too many doctor’s appointments where we’re waiting for the latest test results or surprise company announcements and the job that you’ve been giving your life has up and been pulled out from underneath you. For all those reasons, I find that I’m often drawn to the humor and good deeds in life. Wherever you’ll find humor and a laugh, you’ll find me.
• Find the kindness. I’ve always been drawn to the kindness of strangers.

Where will your loved ones find you?