Telling the “should haves” to take a hike

I should have checked more things off my To Do list yesterday. I had planned to start my day with a brisk walk in the morning and finish up in the evening with a ride on my stationary bike. I had planned to write out blogs for the rest of the week, clean up my desk, and run an errand. 

I should have eaten better too. 

Oh, yea, I should have put on my Superman cape and saved the world from famine and poverty too.

Photo by Content Pixie on Pexels.

Crying over spilt milk

I’ve been noticing lately that the three worst words in the world for me are “ I should have.” I was reminded once again how dangerous they are reading Sara Kjeldsens’ wonderful blog on Monday, Contentment is found in the day to day. The piece reminded me how horribly, regretful and judgmental “I should have” is. Some words are contemplative or thought provoking. Some words bring on a call to action and then some words force you to make natural comparisons.

“I should have [fill in the blank]” does that for me. It forces me to compare myself to someone else who could be in a completely different spot. They could be on Step 131 while I’m on Step 14. How is that helpful?

It forces me down someone else’s journey, instead of my own.

It’s not just others, those three little word force me to compare myself to a past self. I went for a slow run the other day. Instead of being happy that I was getting outside for the first time in goodness knows how long, I started playing the “I should have” game.

In my head, I thought to myself, “my best mile time is 5:20, why is it taking me so much longer now to run a mile?” I even questioned why I slowed down to a walk. Um, hello. The fast mile time that I was regretting being nowhere near came 35 years ago when I was in college. I was younger, I was carefree, my body isn’t the same as it is now, nor would I want it to be.

Photo by Ono Kosuki on Pexels.

No time like the present

Yes, instead of looking at “should haves” and “why nots,” I prefer Nike’s slogan to Just Do It mixed in with an ounce of caution and realism.

Life can be challenging. Life gets in the way sometimes. We don’t always get to check everything off our list. Instead, some days we need grace and a little bit of patience. We need kindness and forgiveness and the chance to fight another day.  We need to live in the present.

Yes, yes, grace sounds very appealing.