Fright night!

I really should save this blog for October for Halloween, but I can’t wait until then. When folks think of horror classics, they think of The Exorcist, IT, The Shining, or Halloween. Oh, I’m sure there are some old-timers who point to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre or even a psychological thriller like Psycho.

I say phooey to all of them.

The scariest movie of all time . . . give me a drumroll please, yup, it’s that classic blood curler, The Wizard of Oz. Yup, there’s no convincing me otherwise. I rewatched it recently with my wife to make sure I wasn’t missing something. Nope, it was just as scary as I remember it as a six-year-old.

We watched it with the doors locked in the middle of the day. I made sure no one else was home, especially my kids, so they couldn’t make fun of me. In addition, I made my wife hold my hand for the entire movie. I had to take those precautions, otherwise, I would’ve had nightmares for weeks. (I’m still not ruling them out.)

Image by Pixabay.

Come out, come out, come out wherever you are!

You think I’m kidding.

There’s a storm to end all storm in the first few minutes of the movie. Someone, the The Wicked Witch of the East dies when Dorothy’s house falls on her and we’re not even in the first half hour. Yes, we all know about those Flying Monkeys, but there’s more. There’s obviously The Wicked Witch of the West and her green skin and haunting laugh. “I’ll get you my pretty, and your little dog too.” Oh, yea, that’s real nice. What did Toto do to you? There’s the scary lion. Yes, he turns out to be a pussy cat, but it’s still tough on a six year old to overcome all that. A talking scarecrow and tin man too. Oh brother.

Oh, I had a teacher in seventh grade who made us watch large portions of the movie and tried to make academic comparisons to the Great Depression and how America at the time had come under the influence of the Populist party. My wife likes to talk too about how it it teaches the value of good friends, the power of dreams, and never giving up. I don’t know, I guess that’s possible that the writer of the original novel, L. Frank Baum, and later the director, Victor Fleming, were trying to make some deep connection, but, in the end, I think they both just wanted to scare the crap out of people.

Who’s with me?

Image by Damir Mijailovic by Pexels.

You can run, but you can’t hide

And let’s go back to those Flying Monkeys. Who comes up with the idea of Flying Monkeys and thinks to themselves, “Oh audiences, especially little kids, will love this?” No one! No, no, no, if you bring on flying monkeys, you’re trying to scare the bejesus out of me.

And guess what? It worked.

We go for a hike in the woods every now and again and what am I most worried about? I should be watching for black bears or copperheads or timber snakes, or even just watching my step. Nope, no can do, I’m still looking out for those monkeys hiding high up in the trees. Damn horror movie!

Oh, it’s a fine movie. I know that The Wizard of Oz has its supporters, folks who make it a tradition to watch it every year, but for the record, I can safely say that Dorothy and Toto are a lovable as can be, but they’re right up there with Michael Meyers from Halloween, Jason from Friday the 13th, and Freddy Krueger from A Nightmare on Elm Street film series.

They’re scary as heck!