Up, Up, and Away (Until the Snack Cart Arrives)

There’s the rumble of the jet engines. The flight attendants finish up their basic pre-flight checks and safety instructions—which no one stops to listen to anyway—and the jet makes its way around the taxiway to the runway.

No matter the airport, you spend a few minutes waiting your turn. You might even come to a complete stop.

Then the engines accelerate. It’s a low, deep roar now.

The jet starts its run down the tarmac. Outside, the scenery blurs into a rush of motion as the speed builds, until the wings finally catch the air.

You feel it first. Your stomach seems to lift.

Up, up, up, and away.

You’re pushed back into your seat, gazing upward like an astronaut riding a rocket toward planets unknown. The hassle of getting to the airport vanishes from your mind. The traffic nightmare is gone. The long trek through the terminal, forgotten. The chatter in the cabin drops a decibel. Everyone is buckled in and waiting.

You feel the pilot bank the plane to the right, leaning your body gently to one side. You continue to gain altitude until the plane levels off.

A few minutes later, the pilot comes on the speaker to announce that you’re free to move about the cabin.

For those few minutes, though, it feels like a miracle. Yes, the miracle of flight. Now it’s back to reality: worrying about overhead bags, timing a trip to the restroom, and waiting for the flight attendant to bring your soda and those damn little Goldfish crackers.

It was nice for a few minutes, though.

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Why Every Airport Feels Exactly the Same

Every airport is a different city, but they all seem to share the same DNA. Over the years, I’ve noticed a few commonalities with airports and airplanes. Here’s my list:

–The same industrial tile and carpet. It doesn’t matter the airport. Could be Newark Liberty International Airport in New Jersey, Heathrow Airport in London, or Orlando International Airport in Florida or a million other airports in between — they all have the same heavy duty floors.

–Frequent Flyers who veer in and out of traffic and know exactly where they’re going and then the people who stop on a dime and hold everyone else up in the terminal.  

–Smudged windows looking out at the baggage handlers getting the next plane ready for travel and airport marshallers and ramp coordinators who use hand wands to safely direct taxiing planes to and from the terminal parking position.

–The dirtiest bathrooms known to man. This is no slam on the folks cleaning them. How do you keep up with thousands of travelers each day?

–Impatient travelers. I’m talking about the people who stand up immediately and are ready to leave the plane even though there’s a horde of other passengers in front of them.

–People on phones in the airport. What did we do before the cellphone?

–The young guy in his twenties wearing flip flops and a neck pillows around his neck. When he sits down, he lifts up his hoodie and pulls out an eye mask. If sleeping was a professional sport, he would be Michael Jordan and Lebron James combined.

–People lost. “No André, we’re going the wrong way.”

–People checking and rechecking their bags.  

–A full rumble in the airport and the plane even when there’s nothing going on. 

The craziness of flight is that we complain about missed connections and late flights sitting in a metal tube miles above the clouds completely glossing over and missing the miracle of flight. What would you add to my list?