The beast on the loose

The Amazon truck pulled up to my house and the driver walked down the driveway. I watched him from my desk, trying to remember what we bought. Was it the school supplies my wife bought for her classroom? Or perhaps the new light I needed for my desk? Before I could figure it out, Nittany our 15-year-old Lhasa Apsa – Bichon Frise started barking like the house was on fire and she needed to get my attention.

Now Nittany was sitting on the window stoop looking out and the driver could see that she posed no danger — the glass separated them — but I still felt bad for him. Nittany’s bark sent him jumping four feet in the air. I couldn’t help but laugh.

If you were the driver, I suspect you might have jumped too. You would’ve thought she was a 200-pound, snarling beast, with fangs ready to rip you to shreds. In reality, Nittany is a 20-pound scaredy cat full of fluff and fur. Oh she looks like an Ewok, the teddy bear-like creatures straight off the set of Star Wars, but I’ve yet to see her throw a spear or bring down an AT-AT (All Terrain Armored Transport) Walker.

Guard duty

I’ve written in the past about Nittany and her sense of duty. She’s getting older. She doesn’t see all that well and her eye brows and beard have turned to salt-and-pepper gray. Despite her age though, she watches the perimeter of our house checking for potential intruders. She saves us daily from countless squirrels and chipmunks, and for that I’m eternally grateful. But I’m writing today less about her guard duty skills and more about her impression of herself.

Some people have big dreams and make them happen. And then there’s Nittany. She has big dreams and makes sure that she’s nowhere around when the proverbial “shit hits the fan.”

Nittany is convinced that she’s a Big Dog and others should be intimidated by her mere presence. If she were to look in a mirror, she would see a ferocious, muscular beast staring back at her. If it were up to her, she would have a permanent seat with all the big dawgs in the neighborhood.

In reality, she’s the tiny cub that roars, but gets no one’s attention until the Lion King roars behind her.

The crazy thing about Nittany is that she’s all bark and no bite. She runs from trouble the minute it shows up on her doorstep. She’ll bark savagely at the other dogs out for walk. She’ll even walk with an attitude where they had tread only a few seconds before, acting like she pushed them off her turf.

Of course, when we are in the yard and another dog owner has their dog on a leash, Nittany barks and barks and then promptly runs behind me, once the bigger dog finally takes notice of her.

“Yea, yea, ignore the doggie behind the curtain,” Nittany says. Who knew she was a Wizard of Oz fan?

She continues, “This guy standing here, the one I’m standing behind, he’s the one who was barking. You don’t want a piece of him.”

I warn you. Do not be tricked by the photos I’ve included of her. I know, I know, she looks innocent enough. She looks like a cuddly Teddy Bear, and I’ll even admit that she’s a fluffy fur-ball to the touch. But, I warn you to take heed. If you don’t watch her, she could get you killed.

Protect me!

Several years ago I took Nittany out for a walk at a park near us. We had just taken a break when I saw a guy with his dog. I’m not sure what breed the dog was, but it was big and looked like it could eat me for dinner. I used to run into guy all the time when I was running. I would wave and he would wave back.

This time, of course, I had Nittany and she decided to give her impression of a crazy dog. She started barking like a fiend. What could I do but lower my head in shame? The dog fortunately was a perfect gentleman. He didn’t snarl or need to be pulled back. He just continued on his way.

If God forbid, he didn’t, it would not have been good. Nittany would have been hiding behind my legs safe and sound and I would’ve been roadkill.

Damned mongrel! Who’s protecting who? Ugh!