Sifting out the good ones

I was playing on my phone recently and I accidentally opened my Contacts Tab. I was getting ready to move on when it hit me that there were a lot of names of people who I haven’t talked to in ages and the list could use a good cleaning.

Like a farmer I needed to separate the wheat — the prized, edible portion — from the chaff or the useless, inedible part. I needed to sort the good from the bad. I imagined putting on my overalls and work boots and sat down for the work in front of me. I scrolled through my list deciding who to keep and who to let go and was surprised to see that many of the names that needed pruned were, in fact, acquaintances who came into my life in a rush and then, poof, were gone.

Click the delete button!

Here’s a few of the contacts I deleted:

• The former boss who traded stories about her kids with me, but I haven’t talked to in ten years. Yes, she was a great boss, but we weren’t that close with each other and I don’t need her outdated phone number.
• The project manager who I talked with daily for two months in the middle of the Pandemic, but never spoke to again.
• The IT guy who I talked with daily my first week on a new job five years ago, but never talked to again after I was laid off.

We come across a variety of people in our lives. They swarm in and swarm out like bees in a beehive with no clear rhyme or reason. Like that beehive, the next time you look up you have an overflowing honeycomb.

The other side of the coin

I had to laugh though when I looked closer. Yes, I was deleting a good number of acquaintances, but I couldn’t help but notice other names of friends and coworkers that I was saving who had and continue to have a significant impact on my life. It was inspiring to see.

• I was thankful to see a friend who helped me out in a pinch with a project a year ago and stayed close ever since.
• I got excited to see another coworker who told me about a great restaurant in Colorado that was a must-stop when I drove cross country with my son a few years ago. We’ve since stayed in touch and talk regularly.
• I saw the name of a couple my wife and I have known since we were married and who we always have a wonderful time when we get together.
• And there were my blogger friends Vicki and Wynne who’ve responded to more than a few WordPress and writing-related questions over the past couple of years.

Yes, many of our friends change over time, but the ones we keep, through thick and thin, are worth their weight in silver and gold.

. . .

“Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.” —G. Randolf

“Real friends are the ones you can count on no matter what. The ones who go into the forest to find you and bring you home.” —Morgan Matson

“Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.” —Ed Cunningham

“My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me.” —Henry Ford